If my friend and (often photographer) Mary had not encouraged me to try on this dress when we went shopping at Aritzia, I’m not sure if I would have picked it up. Wearing this dress made me realize that I have tended to shy away from sharing clothes on my blog that are overtly curve hugging. Quickly scrolling through my previous outfit blog posts made this tendency clear to me as well. I only saw 2 styles I would considered “body con” or “curve hugging”. And I’m sure if you have been following my blog, you have probably noticed this too because I tend to wear A-line dresses and skirts more than anything.
Why have I tended to shy away from this “body con” silhouette so much? I think because of my lack of confidence in my curves. As I’ve mentioned in some Instagram posts before, when I started writing this blog I did not feel 100% confident in how my body looked. I often resented my curves more than I embraced them because they seemed to make finding clothes more difficult. The act of writing this blog has helped me to view myself more positively. I think focusing on my favorite features about myself as well as learning to embrace features I have not always loved in the past has made me change my attitude towards my body. In a way I think writing this blog has been my version of "power posing" for the last year. I'm not sure if you guys are familiar with the Ted Talk by Amy Cuddy on power posing (highly recommend it!), in which she talks about how your posture and body language impact your behavior, and ultimately your life. Basically her argument is "fake it 'til you make it" because it will come true. She discusses how physical actions trigger emotional and behavioral responses. Here's a quick example, let's say that you are in a bad mood because you got stuck in traffic on the way to work. You have two choices (A) continue to frown or (B) smile even though you are upset. In psychological studies they have found that the physical action of smiling can change your internal mood. So when you're day is not going well the external act of smiling can improve your internal mood. (There's a good article on Forbes that explains this effect in greater detail.) For the last year I have been making myself metaphorically "smile" through the act of writing this blog, even when I didn't always want too or feel like it. But what is so astounding to me still though is how an external act was able to change my internal attitude versus the other way around. I think for most of us, confidence is journey rather a place we have already arrived; and we slowly work on it each and every day.
I challenge each of you to write down 5 things you love about your body and post it on your mirror as a daily reminder. And if you ever have a disheartening day of shopping where you can't find anything that fits you revisit this list and remember what features you love about yourself. (If your looking for more body confidence resources, I recommend checking out Short & Tailor's Growth Mindset Style Guide.)
Since I gave you all a challenge, I also have to give myself one! My challenge to myself go forward on this blog is to cover more fashion that celebrates my curves. Wearing this dress made me feel like Kim K for a day. As controversial as she can be, I have to give her credit for not being afraid to wear clothes that shows off her curvaceous-ness. Stay tuned for a wider variety of fashion coverage from me in the future!
Style Cliff Notes
Heels – Forever 21
Clutch – Calvin Klein
Earrings – H&M
Aritiza Off the Shoulder Dress- Size S
What I loved…
- Midi Length – I have a feeling this dress was not actually supposed to be a midi length since it wasn't a petite size. However, I ended up really loving the length anyways because it made the dress look more sophisticated.
- Criss cross detail – I think the back design of this dress is so elegant. When I first wore this dress in Las Vegas, I wore a strapless bra with it. Then when I photographed this dress for my blog I decided not to wear bra and this definitely the way to go if you’re an A cup like me. So much less adjusting needed without a strapless bra because I wasn’t worried about it hanging out.
- Extra stretchy fabric – The other reason I love this dress so much is because of how stretchy the fabric is. It’s so incredibly comfortable and easy to wear.
Bust = 29''
Waist = 26''
Center front = 36.75''
Center front skirt = 25.75''